Well this is a good one. Get your popcorn ready…
So, the kids arrived back tonight at 7pm prompt and #2 announces that he will not be going to the barbers again because they are ‘sexist’. So instead he will be requiring 4-weekly appointments at ex’s city centre show-pony multi-award winning hairdressing ‘brand’ instead of our local high street barbers.
I ask #2 why he has reached this judgement, and he said, “Because Dad said so”. So I ask his Dad. “Why, why, why do you think that the barber is sexist?” His snarky response was “Because he discriminates on the basis of gender” – obviously… so I ask him to provide a more detailed account of the events that lead up to this brave new world.
Apparently ex and #’s 1, 2, 3 and 4 were in the barbers when a woman came into the shop with her son, in a rush, and asked if she could jump the queue so that her son didn’t miss his swimming lesson. Barber says no, you can’t jump the queue. But didn’t stop there. Said, “Only a woman would ask that. A man would never ask that…”. I said I didn’t think that was sexist, I thought it was factual. He has run that business for however many years and presumably a man has never asked, whereas the woman clearly did ask. A man presumably understands the ways of the barber-shop, whereas a woman perhaps does not. This is not a particular problem – she was told, no harm done. It’s hardly indicative of underlying gender-based discrimination in my opinion which ex informs me, I am entitled to.
I express my surprise at ex’s new found Feminist leanings and am told curtly that of course he is a Feminist – he has three daughters.
Oh. Ok. Well. Perhaps you might want to educate #2 about what feminism really is, instead of making a stance on the basis of a one-off trivial episode. Perhaps you could start by thinking about the impact that having children has on women in general, psychologically, financially, physically… and how discriminatory it might be to have 10 years out of a career to raise children and then find the way back into employment blocked. Perhaps that is real gender discrimination, and perhaps being forced to live on silly £s per month because of said career break while husband earns silly £Ks per month… perhaps that is more of an issue than a flippant remark that ‘only a woman would say that’. Perhaps the impact of this kind of thing has huge ramifications for women, and perhaps that is the biggest thing you have to worry about being a father of three daughters, because they could all get married, have kids and then find themselves surplus to requirements. Perhaps that is the issue…
Apparently [roll eyes, look… pseudo-horrified] I am blowing it out of proportion. Well, when I have been going to the barber’s with our son for 10 years, and they have been nothing but fabulous with him, and accommodating of me and my tribe giving everyone lollipops and letting them clamber all over the seats and look at the fish with barely a snip of a comment… I know find myself priced out of my son’s haircut. Dramatic? Well… if you are suddenly going to increase the price of the 4-weekly cut by 500% on the basis of this trivial incident, perhaps… perhaps I have reason to be… irritated. Perhaps. Maybe. Maybe not. Feminist my a*se.
He said she said 